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Stolte Packing Shed - Built by my great, great grandfather along with his sons in 1909.
Messages From Guides
Many signposts are written, many messages are sent…the question is how you do use the information you receive.
My guides tell me that they are always communicating with us, when I asked them about why I’ve had such heightened experiences with them over the past year they indicated it was because my awareness had grown to a level where I actually began to act on what I received in a way that allowed the experience to grow and they indicated that one of the biggest mistakes people make with their guides lies in the way that they attach meaning to the messages.
Like learning a new language, you have to wait for the context and just assume you don’t know. When I began to just hold what I received and take an attitude of curiosity about it, that’s when it really started to take off.
I feel that the final chapter of this series that commenced earlier in the year due to a psychic encounter with my great grandfather Ernest, illustrates this very well. You can find the previous entries in the series here: part one and part two.
Following Intuition
Ernest showed me scenes from his family’s passage from Denver to the town of Cedaredge, CO by train and the trunk that carried all of his belongings to their new homestead when he was just fourteen years of age.
Following his promptings to visit the area, I went to see my grandmother in August, arriving on her birthday. Since she could no longer speak to me due to advanced Alzheimer’s, I curled up next to her on the bed and communicated with her through the only method I had available to me…trance.
The first thing I noticed from years of burying my head into her for gigantic hugs as a child was the acidic undertone that hung against the comforting scent of the woman who had always been a second mother to me. Though I didn’t realize it at the time, my senses were the first to pick up the shifting energy.
My grandmother and I spoke for some time while I was in trance state. We hadn’t talked for long before she mentioned her dad coming to pick her up, showing me a mental movie of him walking through the door and herself as a child of about five running to his open arms for an embrace. He picked her up, gave me a nod and said, It’s time to go see mother. And with that he headed into the early winter evening with my grandmother in his arms toward a small house full of people waiting for them to arrive.
Loose Ends
On December 29th, I received an e-mail from my Aunt saying that my grandmother had given them a scare but seemed to be doing better now. I immediately went into meditation connecting with her only to find that everything was different…I knew she was dying.
My grandmother had been bedridden with Alzheimer’s for years. I always thought there must have been a reason for her to hang on all of this time. Even so, I was surprised to find her in turmoil when I entered her energy as she had been so congruent the last time I communicated with her. I asked her to show me what she was experiencing that was causing this distress.
A glowing scroll-like paper appeared and I knew immediately that all of this centered around some sort of spiritual contract that was still playing out in her energy. As I focused on it, the scene rolled out before me.
There was an inn-like structure in which my grandmother and another woman were holed up. A threat was underway and they were frightened for their lives. A man whom I recognized as one of my uncle’s entered the inn door through the shadows and was erroneously perceived as an enemy by my grandmother who stabbed and killed him.
I got the sense through all of this that my uncle was a very loved and respected man, so it was quite tragic and horrific to them losing him in this way.
In this life, however, the cycle was to play out differently. My uncle has had a troubled life from a very early age. My grandmother always tried to help and protect him, in fact he still lived with her up until the disease advanced beyond her ability to care for him. His anger and vehemence toward life was getting worse so they were separated by force before they got the chance to live out the remainder of their karmic debt.
In viewing this movie of their past life interaction I was gifted with a huge moment of understanding regarding their close bond in life. I called them to me and together we viewed what happened as a group, my grandmother to my right and my uncle to my left.
I mediated by talking about how hurting each other was never an intent but rather a result of circumstance and asked each of them if they were ready to rewrite this contract rather than allow it to play out again. From this vantage point in which they had more information it was easy for them to see how unnecessary it was to continue any further with it and the contract dissolved at the moment of their agreement.
Leaving or Getting Home?
Later on that day my grandmother died very quickly, and with ease. Her father had come to take her home on the same day he departed this earth 48 years before…just as she showed me he would.
When I look back on what I have experienced, I am very grateful that I acted on the information I was given with openness and curiosity about where it would lead because that is what allowed me to receive it fully. As a result, I was present for my grandmother’s last birthday which was immensely important to me. Had I doubted what I received I would have missed it and rationalized my way out of taking the trip. Instead, I did not allow the rational mind to come in and switch things off…so I was then able to be of assistance in clearing her karmic debt before she passed as well.
Paradigm Shift
On December 30th, my husband’s birthday, I received confirmation from my mom that grandma had gone. As a day that our family traditionally celebrates life, I thought it appropriate to buy a bouquet of lilies as a space holder for my grandmother. With their energy I created a place at our table for her to join us…and I know she’s with us still 
When I think about life/death and time, I’m filled with awe. There is a reverence within me that accompanies thoughts of the void; the door that swings both ways through consciousness moving in and out of form in this dance that we describe as life.
This same deep, void is the pool from which our intuition springs…and perhaps therein lies some of the mystery. Every time I use my intuition I think of it as dipping into that pool and swimming with the universe which runs through every thing and every one I’ve ever loved. My thoughts for the new year revolve around swimming there often with curiosity and acceptance of whatever new adventures life brings.
