The Power of Space
A Message From My Higher Self
During a recent meditation I received a beautiful message from my Higher Self that was the inspiration for writing this post that I had been playing with putting together for some time. I had been standing with her by the ocean, which is spiritually very sacred to me. We gazed out over the water together, breathing in the energy, sitting silently listening to the voice of the waves and the wind.
She turned to me suddenly at the height of this experience and said, “Do you know what it is about the ocean that you are connecting with?” I began to go inside and reflect when she directed my gaze by saying, “Look out onto the horizon and bring it all inside of you.” She paused for a moment and said softly, “It is not the water you love, it is the vastness…what would the water be without the horizon? What would this grandeur and beauty be without the space through which you can behold it? Understand that it is the space that you love and bring spaciousness into everything you do.”
The moment it was said, it rang true. The ocean which runs as far as the eye can see is vast, any object on it’s surface is clearly visible. Visually, it is a clean and clear landscape to behold and just by watching it, it begins to create similar properties within me. I organize myself internally to reflect its natural state…my thinking clears, my mind empties, oneness and spaciousness enter and I feel the separation melt away. I am consciousness, flowing, breathing, contracting and releasing without attachment.
Creating Spaciousness in Your Life
Creating space in life is a necessity. Especially when you consider that we can only successfully track 5-7 things, in our conscious awareness at a time. When we hold on to more than that the rest of the stuff gets pushed into our unconscious mind and this is how many of our unconscious patterns are born.
If you are on the path of personal development, you want to consciously control what is added to your unconscious mind. To do that you have to be mindful of your thoughts and maintain a level of spaciousness within your thinking. Here are some quick and easy ways of doing this that you can use throughout your day:
Focus on only one thing at a time.
Many of us run laundry lists of all the things we have to do on a continual loop within our minds. This takes up an enormous amount of space and energy to maintain! Write it down if you think you might forget and then allow you mind to only focus on the step that you can do right now. When that passes, move on to the next in the same order.
Pause every 15 minutes to half an hour and perform patterned breathing. The count can be anything you’d like, just make sure it follows an inhale, pause, exhale execution. Put your full concentration on what each part of the breath feels like. Perform the breathing patterns 3-5 times, and then continue on to the next thing.
Stop and listen to your surroundings. Breathe deeply, while closing your eyes and listening with your full attention for about 2 minutes. Allow no censorship or thoughts about what you hear to come into your mind. Simply be with the sensations, texture and nuances of the sounds. Notice the vibrational quality to them and where in your body you can feel reverberations.
Practice putting your mind down.
This is one of my favorite little exercises in which I visualize giving my mind to something in my immediate environment (the airport is a great place for this). For some of you this may seem like a strange concept, but trust me. This is great fun once you get over the initial strange feeling and it’s a wonderful way to unload from the burden of non-stop thought for awhile!
Coaching and Space
In coaching, space is the foundation upon which all effective coaching techniques are built and when coaching isn’t working, it almost always comes down to the coaches mastery of this core skill. It works because it is one of the purest ways that we can interact with anyone or thing.
When I hold space for a client, I create a sacred field of connectedness and acceptance for them to work in. This is done by literally taking off my own views and filters of the world and entering a pure state of consciousness, where I am fully present and able to respond, where I am listening to what is said, and hearing what has not yet been uttered. From this place I can see very clearly what the client is attending to as well as what lies in the background outside of their vision. It is the quality of this attention, that provides insight and safety and makes coaching such an effective tool.
Holding space however, is not limited to coaching in it’s usefulness. It’s a way of being that can greatly enhance any aspect of life that it is applied to, since nearly all of life, is some form of relating
Generating the Coaching State (Holding Space)
- Breathe. Start by breathing deeply and purposefully.
Visualize. See yourself and your environment bathed in white or golden light.
Feel. Place your attention in your body. Notice how the light fills you up, how each breath feels as it enters and exits your lungs, how your energy is revitalized and you are filled with peace.
Be. Now begin the get curious about the world around you, stretching your feeling senses into the environment around you. Notice how the air feels against your skin, enjoying an experience completely devoid of thought.
Explore. Like an explorer in new territory, interact with your surroundings in a way that lets you examine. Get curious about the paths and places before you and where they might lead. An adventure has found you and like a good story, you won’t know what it means until it is over…so simply allow yourself to get curious about and perhaps a little lost in, the experience!
How do I know when I’m holding space?
You are holding space when there are no distractions and the mind is quiet while the senses are awake. You’ll know you are there because you can be with a person or place without any planning about what you will do or say, or any trying to “figure things out”. There is a trust present as well as an observing curiosity. It is a safe, peaceful place…where anything can be looked at and transformed!
Practice holding space every day and you will be able to produce this state whenever you want to disconnect from looping thought patterns, limitation, dis-ease, resistance or anything else that is troubling you and tap into a new way of being with your problems and therefore discovering what is actually possible for you or anyone else at this given moment