Blessings,
KL

Great question!!!

Rape and murder are not a single behavior but rather a set of behaviors that when combined together we place into a larger category that makes an evaluation of that set of behaviors – killing or sex is a more direct behavior than rape or murder.

The positive intent is not for the person whom the act is performed against, the positive intent in a situation like that would be for the person committing the act and when taken to higher levels usually involves a need for power or control over their lives – and when taken even further up (if they could get that power and control) – usually leads to a perceived better or happy life.

Creating a happy life for yourself is a noble goal – I think we can all agree that you are not going to get it, through rape and murder – however, we sometimes have our needs hardwired to behaviors that simply can not meet our needs and when this is the case the behavior continues in a loop that can not satisfy us.

In NLP we use the operatives because they are useful in producing change. If I have a behavior I don’t like about myself, I’m likely to make an enemy out of it – try to eliminate it – and in essence end up making things worse.

However, if I take it to another neurological level and try to understand what I’m trying to get for myself through this behavior, then I have a lot more options – because another way of getting my needs met is now available to me.

A good example of this in operation is a client who suffered terrible pains in her abdomen every time she needed to speak publicly. When we dove into her body and started communicating with her abdomen, we discovered that her body was trying to signal her to do her absolute best. Once she understood the message, she was able to appreciate this symptom she was having and made new arrangements with that part of her body for how she would prepare before these events so that it could relax and stop signaling her in this way.

I personally had a habit of constantly checking my email. I was wasting a lot of time always “checking in”. I solved this behavior by understanding I was trying to get a sense of connection for myself and building in other ways to be and feel connected to life

So behaviorally, we are driven by often unconscious, unmet needs. By discovering what those needs are (making them conscious), we create new choices for ourselves and as a result our behavior changes!

Much love and appreciation,

PK

Loved how succinctly you put all of this… and now I’m going to throw out a bit of a challenge, out of curiousity more than anything.

Behind every behaviour is a positive intent. How does murder or rape fit into this?